Gandalf the White Detergent
After helping defeat the armies of Sauron and Saruman and restoring peace to Middle Earth, Gandalf decided to start his own business. With only a cap full of Gandalf the White Detergent, you too can transform your dirty grey clothes into the whitest of whites. You’ll feel like a whole […]
Impasse
“None shall pass.” “You shall not pass.” Deep in the mines of Moria under the shadow of the road to Camelot, Gandalf the Grey came to an impasse when he encountered the Black Knight by a small bridge spanning a shallow stream in a bottomless chasm. Lord of the Rings […]
Dark Lord Happy Hour
It’s 9 o’clock on a Saturday, the three Dark Lords have arrived. There a Sith and a Maiar and a Wizard to boot, lamenting how they’ve barely survived. Darth Varder is nursing his pint of ale, while Sauron’s cocktail makes him less of a man Voldemort is chatting away, with […]
Recommended Reading
I love a good read. Some of my favorite series are Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter. I read almost anything as long as it’s not crap fiction about vampires that sparkle. I also love a good movie. Again, some of my all-time favorites are Indiana Jones, Back to […]
Baggins’ Pawn Shop
If you’re looking for Middle Earth paraphernalia, you’ve come to the right place. Baggins’ Pawn Shop offers a wide selection of artifacts, memorabilia, maps, notes and second-hand trinkets at unbeatable prices. Sourced from personal journeys throughout Middle Earth, our inventory includes such collectibles as elf-made swords, dwarf-made mithril vests, smoking […]
The Usual Middle Earth Suspects
This whole thing was a shakedown…there’s no way they’d line five felons in the same row. Five men – Saruman, Sauron, The Witch-King of Angmar, Lurtz, Gollum – brought in on a trumped-up charge to be leaned on by halfwits. To a cop, the explanation is never that complicated. It’s […]
Keep Calm and Destroy the Ring
Really, what can one do when fleeing Nazgul, Orcs, Uruk-hai, Ring-wraiths and the all-seeing eye of Sauron? Keep Calm and Destroy the Ring. Sound advice for all those on a perilous mission into Mordor to destroy the ring of power. Lord of the Rings parody of the old Brittish “Keep […]
My Preciouses?
We wants it, we needs it. Must have the preciouses. He stole it from us. Sneaky little Robotnikses. Wicked, tricksy, false! Gollum, Gollum. Forgotten in the long years since his glory days, hidden under the shadow or more popular gaming consoles, Sonic the Hedgehog’s incessant need to collect rings consumed […]
